I have this problem: a reflection on healing

band aid heart 2

I have this problem. Anyone who’s been in my company has probably noticed it. And anyone who knows me can attest to it.

A scab cannot exist without me picking it. If there is a scab of any sort, it *must* be picked. And I can’t rest until it is!

So recently there’s been a battle between this self-destructive tendency and my body’s healing process. It’s like a race—who can work faster. But one day while I was looking at the damage I once again caused to my poor defenseless skin, I realized something. I keep picking, but it keeps healing. I pick again. It heals again. It doesn’t get tired of giving me a second, third, 555th chance. No matter how many times I pick at it, it still heals. It still gives me another chance to get it right.

So it got me thinking about how many things in our lives we mess up again and again and again. It got me thinking about how many things we keep getting wrong, how many things we do to hurt our own selves. And yet, Allah keeps mending it. Again and again and again. Allah never grows tired of mending it. He never grows tired of healing us. Subhanna Al-Jabbar. Wa Allahu akbar.

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  • Diana Shaibi

    Pretty deep message. I love it.

  • Jish Yusuff

    When even an experience, as minor as getting a scab, is connected to a higher level of thinking, of strengthening faith, and guided into living once again, with Hope. MashaAllah, an extremely profound thought, beautifully put into words.

  • Jemila

    SubhanAllah!!!! Such a beautiful reflection. I actually have this problem where i keep picking at scabs but the thing is, with my persistence on picking these scabs, they become dark spots………. my skin heals but then, the effects of what i have put it through remain visible for the world to see. and that’s where Allah SWT The Most Generous in His forbearance unlike my skin, keeps giving me a chance to mend and leaves no sign for the rest of the world to see what serious damage i have done to myself.
    Jazaki Allahu khayran sis. Yasmin for this amazing reflection….. :)
    May Allah SWT benefit us with the things he has taught us and teach us the things that will benefit us.

  • SubhanAllah, no matter how much it’s picked on, the humble scab keeps returning because unlike us, it is in relentless pursuit and submissive obedience to it’s Creator in order to complete it’s purpose – to stick close to you until you are healed, and only then let you go. AllahuAkbar.

  • Kendriana

    Masha’Allah, sister you are so talented.

    Perfect thoughts to have in my mind before rest.

  • WriteousWanderer

    This is a brave and beautiful reflection on self harming. Although, I wonder if you have looked at the root of the problem and not only how Gracious Allah is with our weighted burdens?

  • Norsyahirahaziz

    thank you. 😉 a very deep thought.

  • Sundus

    MashaAllah sister Yasmin i love your articles! Barakallahu fiki!

  • I love dis..Its lift me up a bit..

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